My Date with Ryan Reynolds

Hey time for lunch, I grab my keys and head off to buy girly bits and a case of Diet Coke at the local CVS.  I step outside my office and immediately spot the sahweeeeeeet Ducati parked in the executive visitor slot across the way – I’m so smitten with the bike that I hardly notice some dude crouched over fiddling with something beside it.  “Hey” I say – “Hey” he replies and I keep walking – now, however it has sunk in – or shall I say smacked me in the face like a lead pipe that holy shit fuck, that’s Ryan Reynolds.  I continue onto my car and think … hmmmm, I musta left something in the office I can go conveniently fetch.  So I hop in my car and circle back around to the visitor parking where I strategically place myself right next to the aforementioned sahweeeeeeet Ducati.  Ryan is now sitting on the curb.  I wave to the valet gal “hey babe – forgot something – brb” and she waves back with a smile.  I walk inside….pause in the hall for a few moments…then skip back outside praying now that I don’t trip or choke on my gum.  Me, never missing an opportunity, say “sahweeeeeeet bike.”  Ryan says “thanks – how you doin’ today?”  “Great, thanks” I respond, (allthewhile thinking “so much better now – and, again, “don’t trip or choke on your gum”). I then move on in an aloof manner pausing to tell him in my best phone sex operator/game show host voice to enjoy the rest of his day – to which he smiles and responds “you too.” 

I then drive off thinking….you’re fucking damn right, you just shared a moment with Ryan Reynolds. 

 Ok, so in theory it wasn’t a date…but in my mind it will forever be cherished as one…and at the end of the date, he will have looked just like this…

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