How did I get Here?!

How did a small town girl like me end up at Ron Jeremy’s 53rd Birthday Party?!  What a surreal night peppered with a slew of porn stars, Ultimate Fighters and Reality TV Show 15 minutes of famers – and why on God’s green earth was “Napoleon Dynamite” there?  Trying to show off his skills to some porn chicks I imagine….chicks only like guys with skills afterall…bow hunting skills, computer hacking skills and ninja skills mostly if I’m not mistaken.

While I missed most of the fun sitting outside at the door charging the requisite $20 bucks to get in – hey man it’s not your first born it’s $20 fucking dollars and the place is full of whores – the evening did have it’s moments, like when Coolio hit on me …. slide, slide, slippity slide….and they had to politely ask Ron to stop ramming some chick behind a curtain…how do you eloquently ask Ron Jeremy to stop fucking a girl when he’s used to hearing “Hey Ron – you ready to fuck this girl?” 

Anyway, who knows where I’ll end up next…

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