Porn Star Karaoke, Part II-The Sequel

First of all, my new friends are quickly turning me into an alcoholic…. 

Now, being a singer, I’ve never made it a mystery how much I abhor Karaoke….but there’s just something about Porn Star Karaoke that makes me think, how can it be bad?  And, after week 2 – my faith in the system that is Karaoke is slowly being restored.  Ok, it’s canned music with subliminal prompts, and even some back up vocals – but hey, N’Sync, among so many others, made an illustrious career out of singing to canned music. 

A few of us arrive before the rest and secure a booth.  On each table is a Bible of songs…literally thousands of them…there were like 10 pages of just Elvis and Beatles songs.  I’ve sung a hell of a lot of songs in my day, having a repertoire of nearly 400 at one point.  But, I’m so overwhelmed by this catalog of material I can’t think of anything I actually know anymore.  I pick a song I’ve sung a million times….at least….and figure it’s a safe bet.  The place is filling up slowly with most of the tables already taken, but nobody is drunk enough to start singing.  No bother, I’ve certainly never had to be drunk to sing.  I’m up like second or third and actually think to myself, wait this is Karaoke, maybe I should have a little more to drink.  I sing “Like the Way I do” by Melissa Ethridge – and although I have sung it at least a million times before, I find myself following along with the prompter like that little dancing Sesame Street ball….and I actually smirk a little bit because I’m thinking “look it’s like the little dancing Sesame Street ball.”  I finish not feeling particularly triumphant as I was so busy sort of singing along, I didn’t really feel like I’d sung it at all….but I get a few “hey that was great” as I head back to our table where friends are now starting to arrive all at once. 

The place is jammed with people and friends start hitting the Karaoke mic.  Jayar – how brave were you to sing “Hard to Handle” by the Black Crowes?!  That’s a tough one even for a seasoned musician like yourself.  And after drinking a bit more, Jayar and I decide to hit the mic together in classic Karaoke style to duet a little Grease diddy called “The One That I Want” by John Travolta and Olivia Newton John.  He’s thinking let’s put a twist on it and I sing the male part, and he’ll sing the chick part – but he chickens out at the last moment and sings the male lead – cuz he’s mostly thinking at this point that he doesn’t know this song at all and he better go with the safe angle.  I reassure him that everyone knows this song – it’s been floating around in our subconscious minds since like 1978 – and he steps up and does his thang flawlessly….besides everyone’s drunk by now anyway, so who’ll notice if we fuck it up at this point?!  And, isn’t that the best part of Karaoke?  It isn’t who’s the best – it’s who’s the worst!!!

But, alas, my faith in Karaoke is restored…you know what – it is fucking fun isn’t it?!  Or, maybe it was just the alcohol talking (or singing)….

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