10. If you sustain an erection for more than 4 hours you should brag to your friends – 6 hours and you should seek urgent care!
9. Limo driver picked me up and took me to Mario Lopez’ house where he asked me “Do you know Mario?” and I replied…”No, I’m just responsible for escorting him tonight” at which point I reviewed my slutty brownie/girlscout uniform and realized…”fuck, now he thinks I’m an escort”
8. Mario’s girlfriend, Karina Smirnoff, saying in the back of the limo “AC adjust the AC”
7. Mario’s girlfriend liquored up and farting in the back of the limo.
6. This Video
5. Mario yelling at me all night “Janelle don’t leave me – how will I get home”
4. Having 3 chicks kicked out of Area for sneaking in…that’s right, I look unassuming but I can have you removed from a Hollywood hotspot
3. The security dude threatening to have me removed…and then apologizing for being a dick when he learned who I was….wait, you mean I’m somebody? Go figure…
2. Me and my friend Talon…if either of us had hair…
1. Me yaking in the gutter for an hour and half…Thank God…nobody got a picture of that…although I’m told some will cherish the “mental picture” !!!!!